Madam President...It's Time!

Greetings from sunny Scottsdale, AZ.  Yes, I am on vacation again...it's a tough life.  I am visiting my parents.  And my sweet Ruby Caroline got to make the trip with me, she is currently asleep next to me on the couch.  It has been quite some time since I last wrote.  Since we last chatted, I have been in Dubai and the Maldives.  Let me tell you ladies and gentlemen, the Maldives are as close to paradise as I think I will ever see.  White sand beaches, gorgeous sunsets, the bluest water, amazing food and fabulous service.  It was pretty incredible.  I got to do three of my four required open water dives, so I am almost certified to dive.  And I have been busy planning my next trip to Australia, another three week vacation with some pretty incredible experiences planned.  And I am hoping to finish up my certification for diving when I am in Australia.

So most of my followers know that this blog is about being classy and fabulous.  And very rarely do I make political or social statements, BUT I need to talk about Hillary Clinton's run for the Presidency.  I happen to agree with most of her politics and whether you do or don't, that is OK.  However, ladies and gentlemen seriously, it is time for the most powerful country in the world to have a female leader.  If we are serious about committing to women being equals to men in this country, that means we are accepting of a female leader.  Now I am not asking you to support Hillary simply because she is a woman, vote based on who you think will do the best job.  But, especially to the classy gentlemen out there, don't NOT vote for her simply because she is a female.

And for those of you have doubts about the abilities of a female.  I found this article interesting and a good way to debunk some of those arguments.

I have already started to prepare myself for being upset about things that are said about female leaders, we are too emotional, we are not tough enough to run this country.  It is such a double edged sword for a female.  As a strong female leader, you are required have the right combination of femininity, quick decision making, the courage to stand up for what is right, emotion and intelligence.  If you are too strong, you are a bitch.  If you are too kind, you are a push over.  Trust me, I have dealt with it most of my life.  And Hillary certainly is the warm, fuzzy type, but she certainly knows how to make a good decision, be strong and god knows she is a smart cookie.  Girlfriend even got herself a stylist....in order to be a good leader, you do need to be be well put together, it is the classy way.  :)

So we are heading into a historical time in the US, as I believe Hillary Clinton has a real shot at being our next president.  So as classy people, ladies and gentlemen seriously, let's keep an open mind about our next possible president, because in this classy lady's opinion, it is TIME for us to have a female leader in the US.  Go Hillary.

....keep your chin, heels and standards high....
BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS.

Being classy means being a good leader as well

Good evening ladies and gentlemen seriously.  Seems fitting that this classy lady would be posting while watching the Red Carpet and getting ready for the Oscars (MY FAVORITE).  I am such a dork about fashion so this is amazing.

SO happy to report another Anti Valentines Day Pub Crawl is in the books.  And while we only made it to two bars, we had such a GREAT time.  Our party has grown each year and this year, I think we had about 20 people at one point.  While all of the ladies and gentlemen were pretty seriously in the bag, everyone acted appropriately, dancing and singing and seriously being the life of the party.  So thanks to all for a great time.  And I might have kissed a cute boy as well.  ;)

As many of you know, I volunteer for my amazing sorority, Gamma Phi Beta.  In addition to being a regional director for region 8 (Northwest states), I also am a part of the Presentation Team.  So I get an opportunity to present and facilitate sessions for our collegiate chapter leaders.  First and foremost, I get to work with awesome ladies to actually do the presenting.  Second, I get a chance to interact with our leaders of tomorrow.

And of course, having been a volunteer leader for the organization for 10+ years and presenting to our current leaders got me to thinking about how to be a classy leader.  I have had an opportunity to a a leader of my own business as well.  And there are many actions I see ladies and gentlemen do that make me crazy as a leader.  And so I thought I would share my list of actions that a classy lady can take to be a good leader.

1. IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU!  Sometimes I think about my leadership positions, and I simply don't understand what I do... honestly.  My team does all the work.  Leaders that make success about them...are not leaders.  WOW, this is a hot button issue for me.  
2. Transparency.  The best thing that you can do is share as much as possible.  While I was running my own business, I shared all of my numbers, revenue, etc with my team...all members, paid and volunteers.  And it is very important for people to feel a part of the team if they feel they have all of the information, EVEN if it isn't imperative for them to complete their job.
3. Humility and Vulnerability.  Your team needs to know that you are not perfect, sharing your failures and times in your life when things weren't perfect, make you human and more relatable. As women, many times we are expected to be SUPER MOM or SUPER WOMAN or both and we find it challenging to admit that we aren't.  We get by with a little help from our friends.
4. Don't take yourself too seriously.  Have Fun.  Your team or your audience is much more interested in you, if you can poke a little fun at yourself.  You will lose people if you are too dry, get people involved in the presentation - facilitate, don't talk at them.
5. Re-read action number one.

Please know that I am certainly not an expert on the subject. But I felt compelled to share after spending a few weekends facilitating these conferences.  Being a classy leader is something that I am very passionate about, so ladies and gentlemen seriously...take it for what its worth.

Enjoy the Oscars.  Very soon I will be leaving for Dubai and the Maldives for 10 days.  A very tough part of my of my job, I know, try not to feel sorry for me.

...keep your chin, heels and standards high...

BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS!

How do you solve a problem like Mr Big?

Hello ladies and gentlemen seriously!  I trust that your new year has started out with class.  We are getting close to that one holiday that I continue to dislike HIGHLY year after year.  Yes, we are having our annual Anti-Valentine's Day Pub Crawl, which continues to grow each year.  Why? because no one likes to celebrate that sappy holiday, even the coupled people.  So many of my married and single friends will be pub crawling on V day!

I have been traveling quite a bit for my sorority volunteer job.  Several weekends in January and February and it is always inspiring to spend the weekend with women with similar values who are willing to give up their free time to help inspire collegiate women to be the best that they can be.  And in March, I am getting ready to travel with another classy lady (my travel agent friend from Reno, met her in New Zealand).  We are going to Dubai and the Maldives, can't wait!  Warm weather, here I come!

So I thought it was time to talk about my Mr. Big.  You know who he is...most single ladies have one. Ladies Seriously?  Who is yours?   In my case, our relationship is almost as long and as storied as Carrie and Big's relationship, honestly.  We have known each other for 14+ years, between us, three divorces and for him little people are involved.  And for both of us, lots of bad decisions and heart break.  But yet, still after having gone through everything, this classy lady can't seem to let him go.  WHY?  I am an intelligent woman who basically has her S**T together.  I am a catch, darn it.  Why after everything, do I continue to respond? Probably because I have been in love with him for years and it never goes away.  And previously I hadn't been able to say no at all, and then we would make plans and he would almost always cancel....NOW, I will say I had a small victory last year when I did say, NO, we can't go out.  He was upset and he did go away for a little bit, but here he is again and I am back talking to him.

So ladies seriously, here is my message for all of those of you who have your Mr Big that you can't let go.  Be smart, don't let him string you along.  If he does, move on.  Be smart, don't start walking the two of you down the aisle, this is not a fairy tale.  Be smart, if he steps up to the plate, then by all means, go for it.  But until he has the Mr. Big epiphany and flies to Paris to get you, it is probably best to move on.  Because by continuing to let him string you along, you are closing yourself to someone else great (in my case, haven't a lot of offers of recent, except for my cab driver from the airport last night, figures that he is only guy to ask me out in the past 5+ months)

So ladies seriously, here is my problem solution for your Mr Big, unless you are convinced that he will be committed to you only RIGHT NOW, move one.  You deserve to be treated the way Mr Big treated Carrier AFTER they got married.  :)  And remember actions speak louder than words.

This is the end of my public service announcement for Valentine's Day!  Keep it classy ladies.

....Keep your chin, heels and standards high....
BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS!

Classy Ladies are also good to their girlfriends

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.  I trust that you are all enjoying your holiday.  Yes, I do love my job, this is a busy time for us in the world of travel, if you can imagine, lots of people want to travel during the holidays and there are lots of cancelled flights.  So while I do get lots of days off until January 5th, I have been on call.  Unfortunately, we have been busy!

Me?  I had a wonderful holiday.  Spent time with my family here in Chi, hosted some friends at my house, had a wonderful dinner with some friends on Christmas.  And was reunited with a friend I haven't seen in a long time...let's just say, I hope to see him again very soon.

Last night, I had a chance to go out with a friend for some cocktails.  We tried a different neighborhood...Logan Square....let's just say, it was a different scene.  We felt dressed up and cute....which is not necessarily the case when we go out in the LP.  And there were just a lot of beards..Gentlemen seriously, lumberjack chic is pretty hot, but not when every guy in the bar is like that.  And well, you know me, I like the bald guys.

But anyway....on to my subject for this post.  The gorge blonde that I was out with last night (and BTW, it has a little pink in it now) said something that rang true to me...You can tell a lot about a woman by the quality of her friends.  And if you think about it, it is so true.  How many classy ladies do you know who also have fantastic friends?  That usually means she is a pretty good friend.  And yes, we all know those ladies that don't have a lot of girlfriends, probably means that she doesn't treat her friends very well.

A long time ago, my mom told me that my uncle told her that if you can count 5 good friends in your lifetime, you should consider yourself lucky.  Well, I am happy to say that I consider myself very lucky.  For all you classy ladies out there, can you name 3-5 friends that would drop everything if you needed them?  Last night, I found out that my best friend (whom I love dearly) was emailing another friend of mine (unbeknownst to me) while I was dating the last douche bag boyfriend to make sure that I was OK as she was very worried about me.  WOW, thanks to that BF, it's really nice to learn how much she cares.

So here is my message ladies seriously....it is classy to be a good girlfriend because at the end of the day, men come and go, but you always have your family and friends (and of course, there is also my favorite quote, boys come and go, diamonds are forever, that one works as well).  And you need to take care of those relationships.  Return phone calls, shoot a text, be mindful of your girlfriends.  Practice good girlfriend code, don't blow them off for a new boyfriend all of the time, don't hit on her ex or her potential new BF, be honest, be supportive and just be there when she needs you.

Well, here is cheers to all of you!  Happy New Year!  This classy lady is fabulously happy and ready for 2015!  I hope you all are as well.

......Keep your chin, heels and standards high....
BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS!

YOU...Just do you...

Happy holidays to one and all!  I trust that you are all keeping it classy this holiday season.  This girl is happy to report that all of the Christmas shopping is done, all cards are done and ready to be mailed, Christmas decor is done AND I did my annual trip to the Museum of Science and Industry to see the Christmas trees around the world last week.  It has been a pretty amazing year here....still love my job, got to take my parents to Australia for three weeks, am planning three more amazing trips for next year and after years of financial struggles (after owning and closing a business)....feels like things are back in the black as they say.  So what did I do to celebrate....well, today I got a pedicure and bought an amazing bottle of wine just for me.  :)

So one of my besties (a guy) has been doing tinder for the last couple of months and recently he has been to posting tinder fails on his FB page.   Lots of humor but in seriousness about the lead in pictures that women post on tinder.  Ladies and gentlemen seriously....this is an app where someone decides if they like you based on a picture and they decide within about 3 seconds. Ya might want to think about the pictures you are using.

So all of this online dating stuff, of course, had me thinking about our online persona and what we put out there for the world to see.  Not just on online dating, but also on facebook, twitter, instgram etc.  Why is it that we are SO afraid to be real on all of those sites?  Ladies and gentlemen, let's take the online dating thing first...why do we post pictures that don't actually show us?  Group pictures, really old picture, pictures with sunglasses, logos of your favorite sports teams?  HUH?  How are you going to make online dating work if you aren't being truthful about who you are and what you look like?  UM...newsflash, if he or she likes your profile, you are going to meet in person eventually and then what?  I know a lot of women that pretend they are something they are not to get a date, wow, that sounds miserable.

Ok, let's also talk about people that are constantly posting/tweeting about how super uber ungodly happy they are.  Really?  If you are that happy, why are you wasting time posting about it and not enjoying it?  I mean I get, if good things happen, post about it....but all of the time?  Makes me think that someone is trying to convince themselves how happy they are instead of everyone else.

And then of course, there are the ones that complain and moan about how unhappy/unlucky they are?  You know the ones that post crap like this:   So sad today, I want to cry....  And then what happens, everyone posts something like...what is wrong???  Seriously, ladies and gentlemen, if you are sad, call a friend or a family member, someone who can actually help you....not the random facebook friends out there.

So ladies and gentlemen seriously, my soapbox message about keeping it classy is this today:  social media and online dating is fun.  Take it for what it is....not real life.  BE YOU and your online date, your social media network will respect you a heck of a lot more than if you are someone else online and show in up person differently.  And think about it this way, if you aren't being true about who you are online, and someone likes your online persona, when they meet you in person, they will be disappointed, it will be one date and out...and then you will be back to square one.  SOUNDS exhausting, why not skip those steps?

At the end of it all....Everyone should be proud of who they are...OWN IT, WORK IT...don't apologize.  And to quote a song ..... every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top.  Thanks Meghan Trainor...All about the base.  :)

So that's all for me today.  Have a wonderful holiday season.  Be nice to your family, they are the only ones you have.  Eat, drink, be merry and keep it classy.

....Keep your chin, heels and standards high...
BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS!

You know I have to talk about it....

Good evening ladies and gentlemen seriously!  Happy Thanksgiving.  Time to spend time with family, overeat and hopefully be classy.

Well, you know I had to talk about it....Naked, Oiled Up, NOT CLASSY Kim Kardashian.  And as much as I hate to devote space on my blog about classy women to a lady that I don't find classy, I feel compelled to address the issue.

First of all, let me say, that I am happy to see that we are finding curvy women like Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez and Beyonce beautiful and sexy.  All of them are very beautiful women.

Second of all, I am happy that Kim has enough body confidence to put it all out there in a magazine and on the internet.  BUT that is where my positive comments end.

LADIES!  We do not need to see her naked, really.  Kim, cover it up, you are just as sexy when you are wearing a nice jersey wrap dress.  And let me also say that the photo is photoshopped, her waist is not that small.  SO NOT classy!  You don't see Taylor Swift naked, do you?  Nope, she actually has class.

The crazy thing is on my facebook feed that same day there is an article that says, STARS REAL WEIGHTS.  And of course, Kim Kardashian is listed on there....saying....getting ready for this... she weighs like 125 pounds.  UMMM, can I call bull*&%$?  I mean, ladies seriously, if we are going to be real, BE REAL and say guess what Kim weighs like 150-160 pounds.  That's real.

And then there is the whole issue of PLUS SIZED models and the stuff that came out from the Calvin Klein model.  A size 10 is a plus sized model?  HUH?  Average size for a woman in the US today is 14.  So technically a plus size should be 18-24, right?  So I am 145 pounds, size 8...what does that make me?  A plus size, I am sure.

All of this media crap really makes this classy lady angry, NO WONDER, we have so many young ladies with eating disorders and negative body image.  They look at Kim Kardashian and say that is a 125 pounds, then they kill themselves getting their weight to that, when it is not realistic.  Our young women need positive body role models.

Ladies seriously?  Why can't we just be real and admit our weight.  Be healthy, eat healthy, exercise and wear clothes appropriate to your size.  Doesn't seem that difficult.  I guess the best way to get the media to stop sensationalizing women like Kim Kardashian is to stop looking at it and talking about it.  SO, ladies and gentlemen seriously, this is where my comments end.

Keep it real ladies!  Be true to you, be healthy and confident in who you are.  That is way more sexy that a naked, oiled up bootie on the internet.

Enjoy your holiday.  My Ruby Caroline gets to go to see her grandma and grandpa for a week.  So I am checking out until December.

....Keep your heels, chin and standards high....
BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS!

Random Thoughts from a Classy American Traveler

G'day ladies and gentlemen seriously!  I have returned from my BIG 3 week trip Down Under.  I spent most of the month of October traveling with my parents.  It was an amazing trip and I am so fortunate to have the opportunity to travel like that.  Just another perk of my awesome job.

So I thought for this blog post, I would give my random thoughts about being a classy traveler.  Most of them will be directed at my fellow Americans who unfortunately have a tendency to be the worst travelers (besides our friends from Japan and China).

First of all, Sydney is an amazing city and if I win the lottery or marry a millionaire, I would tell you all to peace out and I would be gone, living in a fab condo looking at the harbour, with my sailboat parked out front.  Since that probably isn't going to happen any time soon (I don't play the lottery and I can't pick a decent man to save my life), I may have to stay in Chicago OR perhaps my awesome company will have a job opening for me in the future.

I did have the opportunity to do a lot of small group touring, which of course, gives you an opportunity to meet lots of people.  I met a lot of Australians, Kiwis and Europeans.  And yes, lots of Americans.  Japanese and Chinese tend to travel in large groups, so I didn't encounter them on my trip.  As Americans, we need to be thankful for what we have in this country.  And I find that most people are, but I also find that Americans think that all other countries should be like ours.  And honestly, that is disrespectful.  Part of the reason that you travel is to experience new cultures, new ideas but also to appreciate other nationalities and countries.  And to respect that, you need to try to do things the way that the locals do...I find that many Americans have trouble with that.

Additionally, many of the Americans I met were so busy telling me about how money they had and trying to make themselves seem important.  BLAH!  Who cares?  Honestly, I could tell in the first 5 minutes of speaking with these people, what they were about and I had to steer clear.  Now, of course, this isn't unique to travelers, this happens a lot.  But I found that only the Americans were the ones that were concerned about that.

Lastly, when on a small group tour, Americans, it shouldn't be your goal to drink every bit of wine/alcohol provided.  Seriously, I was on a boat cruise and the Americans were the ones that were booing the staff when they took their glasses away...REALLY?  Really gross and disgusting.

So American ladies and gentlemen seriously, have some class when you travel, don't expect all other nationalities to think that America is the best (it is great, but certainly not the best), please please be respectful and do as the locals do and generally be accepting of all experiences and cultures (otherwise, don't travel).  And don't get drunk and stupid.  And don't expect everyone to speak English (I had this lovely Italian couple at one of my dinners, their English wasn't great, but people were just talking louder to them...poor people.  They were from Milano...AHHH, I would love to go there).

I know I have done blog posts before on this, usually after every time I travel, but boy, does it upset me.  If you want to take a peek at my photos, they are posted on my FB page.  All 600 of them.

So we are now getting into the holidays, and it tends to make people crazy (families sometimes have that effect on people).  Ladies and gentlemen seriously, keep calm and remember they are family and you just need to go with the flow.  Be merry, spread positive cheer!  And keep it classy, no one likes big fights and icy silence on Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, etc.

....keep your heels, chin and standards high...
BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS!