Monday, October 31, 2011

And another classy Halloween is in the record books...

Hello ladies and gentlemen, HAPPY HALLOWEEN. I hope you all enjoy your day of costumes and candy, wherever you are. Since last year, I skipped the Halloween celebration as my fabulous parents were in town, I thought I should tell you about my Halloween evening in Chicago. Once again, a classy, fabulous, fun evening out with friends. Halloween Saturday night in Chicago, just cracks me up, I mean, it doesn't get better than taking cab to dinner and seeing two guys crossing the street, one in a Rocky Balboa costume and one in an Elvis costume...Hilarious!

So we started the evening with about 20 of us at a Sushi Restaurant...BYOB. So fun, our poor servers, we were loud and having a great time. HEY, they got a good tip. And once again, NO ONE at our table was inappropriate or dressed like HO. Everyone was properly covered with fun costumes, like the redhead who was Rosie the Riveter or the cute blonde who was Miss Piggy. Hats off to one of my gay friends who went as Patsy from Absolutely Fabulous, yes, ladies, he wore heels. And then complained about it...welcome to our world. And me, well, I was dressed as Amy Winehouse, complete with the wig, the eye makeup and tattoo sleeves. It was great.

So yes,then we went to a regular hang out and again, I really didn't see inappropriate costumes, I was thoroughly impressed. One blondie was dressed as a Twister Game (short skirt) and she was walking around asking the guys to spin the wheel...but all in all, not bad. We danced the night away. Yep, I did some bar kissing with some fraterntiy looking dude with a backwards ball cap (don't know his name AND hate the backwards ball cap look...seriously?). The funny part was he kept asking for my number...didn't give it to me, UMMM, I will give you my phone number when you grow up and wear your hat the right way, goof.

No one in our group was too drunk or inappropriate, we just danced and had a great time once again. I just love that each year my friends know how to have fun on Halloween and still keep it classy! And when it was time for JZZRGRL to call it night (yes, I do know my limits), I walked out to the is close to impossible to get a cab at 2:30 AM on Halloween Saturday. But this classy gentlemen (who remembers chivlary is not dead), came up to me, asked where I was headed, gave him the cross streets, he was heading in the same general direction. And then he just ran off, so I thought to myself, well, guess I am still looking. Then a cab pulls up, and HE is in it. Tells me to get in and split the cab. SO THANK YOU, random classy dude for helping a girl out.

I was fortunate enough to have a good Nebraska sorority sister in town for the weekend, so she stayed with me. Great to catch up with her.

So we are into November. Almost time for my favorite holiday...Thanksgiving AND the best part is I get to be in ARIZONA this year for the holiday. Nothing says an awesome T-DAY like eating outside.


Thursday, October 27, 2011

Refreshing...a guy that actually did more of the talking...

Hello ladies and gentlemen...don't mean to disappoint, but it is JZZRGRL and not Pittsburgh. He is getting a big head from all of the positive comments from his post, so rest assured, we will ask him back as a guest blogger in the future. Thanks Pittsburgh.

Anyway, just got done with a trade show. And yes, the ladies fashions were a bit poor. I mean, one woman had on skin tight pants, that were about two inches too short with ugly shoes. Ladies seriously, find a good tailor! Which reminds me, I need to find a new one, still trying to find one that will take in all of my jeans, since they don't fit. That's right, I am down three sizes in jeans. OH BABY!

So it has been a bit busy in the "dating" scene for me, not sure I would call it dating, since people don't really date anymore. I finally hung out with the scocer player on Saturday night. We met a year ago and never could put our schedules together...and then of course, I met HT, so I wasn't interested. And now I am almost over being heart broken (I think). So we hung out, watched Bucky get beat by Sparty (yay). And I have to say, fairly impressed, he seems like he has it pulled together. And he actually TALKED to me about stuff, not just football, heck, I was the one talking about football. We will has potential.

So of course, in typical fashion, you know I met someone at a trade show. We hung out on Tuesday night. He lives in Florida, ladies and gentlemen, so don't get any ideas, but fun guy. Fun night, went to Buddy Guy's place, never been there. So Buddy Guy, thanks for a fun evening. And if you are wondering ladies and gentlemen, I am a lady (most of the time) and it was only drinks.

You know my track record with boomerang boyfriends, and so Baltimore is kind of back around, I mean, he still lives in Baltimore, and is not moving ever (because of a WHACKO ex-wife and kids, it's always something isn't it)... so long term potential is not there (since I want to move to AZ), but had a great phone conversation with him last night. I guess the part that I liked about it, he did most of the talking (which for those of you that know me, it quite a FEAT). He actually talked to me about important stuff, like his future career path, where he wants to go, his feelings on it, stuff about his kids and was great and I found it refreshing because he actually talked about stuff that was important to him, including his feelings on it (the only guy that has done that with me was HT)...And he didn't have an agenda, like he wasn't going to get me into bed later. Because he was 5 states over...

And I have said it a lot, but conversation seems to be a lost art these days, especially with men, and so Baltimore (I know you aren't reading this), thank you. It was great to talk to you (listen to you). Hopefully I will see you soon.

So Halloween is upon us ladies and for the LOVE OF PETE, keep it classy. Ladies, don't do the cliche thing and dress like a HO. Have fun, be cute, be sexy and keep it classy. And that also means, don't drink too much. And if you happen to be a member of my sorority and are currently in college, for the LOVE OF PETE, behave this weekend, I don't want to visit your chapter ;).

Happy Halloween and Cheers to the start of the FOOD holidays...Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, New Years, Chinese New Year...Here we go. Keep those calorie counters handy.


Wednesday, October 12, 2011

A ladies seriously FIRST...a guest blogger...

So I had a request from gentleman who wanted to give the ladies seriously audience something from the man's point of view. And honestly, he did a good job, so here you go!

Hey everyone “Pittsburgh” here. So being a random guy friend of Jzzrgrl’s, I get to hear (AKA IM via Skype) stories about the search for love and well I am also on a similar quest to find someone in my life. After many failed attempts and bad dates, I have turned to the online world of dating. And well I have found a lot of things on your profiles that, as a guy, drive me a tad nuts with you ladies. So I figured I would give you a heads up from a guy’s perspective on how to write a successful dating profile:

1. Username – I understand you are creative ladies but if your name contains the words “lonely”, “spoiled” or “bitch” chances are I do not want to date you.

2. Photos – Yes as a guy these are the first thing I look at. You do the same now get over yourself!!! So many errors here ladies. A. Keep them current, if you are in your mid 30’s and your pictures look to be mid 20’s we will assume they are just old. B. I’m not here to see the scenery on your vacation or your dog. I’m here to see you. C. Photos with other people are fine but please some just of you. If your bestie is in every picture how do I know which one you are? D. Photos with other guys. I will just assume you have had “relations” and he is not your brother. E. The weird duck face thing. Don’t do this, you are not seven and making faces is NOT sexy…

3. Location. Please if you are in a large city make mention of what neighborhood you are in. You may be cute but are you an hour in traffic cute?

4. Activities. I hate when you say “I like going out, but I also enjoy a night in”… This says absolutely nothing. You may as well just write how much you enjoy breathing and blinking while you are at it. There is only so much room to write, say something that counts.

5. Descriptions – Please be aware that the term “about average” is being used with great liberty. Relationships are built on honesty, don’t lie if you lie and you meet up with some guy chances are he will be looking at his watch real soon on the date.

6. Income – If you only make 30 grand why the hell are you saying you only date guys who make 75 plus? Really girls… real expectations please.

7. Keep it current – Your profile says how old you are so if you start your profile with “I’m a 28 yr old…” and if your profile says your 30 it’s a good indicator that you don’t pay much attention to it.

Now these are just some tips to help you find a quality classy dude. Please also be advised that, well there are d-bags out there ladies, and I’m sure you may have come across some by now. These are the types that lead off an email with “Hello Gorgeous…” and then go on to tell you nothing but about themselves… Also these are the types that will say they enjoyed reading your profile and you have a lot of similar activities. Have they given you an example? No, well guess what they have cut and pasted this same email to 50 girls. Trust me, this happens. You know how I know??? Well, No I haven’t done it; I luckily have a co-worker also trying online dating. She sends me this stuff and I can read thru B.S. for her. It amazes me what some people try. Learn to read between the lines ladies.

Well hopefully you have enjoyed reading this, found some humor and maybe go back and refresh those profiles. It will only help you find a better quality of guy at the end of the day. Stay Classy Ladies and Gentlemen...

VERY nicely put, I am impressed. Thanks Pittsburgh. BONSOIR, CHEERS AND CIAO BELLAS!

Monday, October 10, 2011

Ladies! Know your outfit limitations...

Hello ladies and gentlemen. Hope you all had a classy weekend. Hats off to my Huskers for their come from behind win over the Buckeyes and of course to the Sooners for their SMACK DOWN of the Cows of Texas (TU)... Well, I spent the weekend in lovely Iowa City, IA...yes the home of our new/old rivals, the Hawkeyes. Herky...what a silly name for a mascot. Anyway! I was going to visit some sorority women and was traveling with a group of FABULOUS alumane volunteer leaders.

As we were approaching our destination on campus, we encountered three different groups of women. And I have to be honest, I was appalled at their attire. EVERY SINGLE woman had on a short, tight skirt with a little tank top and 3 inch heels (OR those DAMN plastic flip flops). This is a COLLEGE town on a Friday night at 8 PM ladies. Where in the HECK are you headed? The divey sports bar downtown? The attire wasn't even appropriate for LA or NYC, let alone IOWA!...Another woman was dressed in SKIN TIGHT skinny jeans, with a top that hit her about mid-abs and 5 inch heels, I have to say she looked like she was going to be dancing "exotically" later...Just unbelievable. So it sparked a discussion that went further than, "just dress appropriately for your environment or destination". So my dear cute chapter sister offered the term...Know your outfit limitations!

1. If your skirt is so short that we might see your Britney, don't wear it. No one in public wants to see a whoo-whoo or butt cheeks.
2. If you bend over and someone can see your navel or your boobs, get some fashion tape or don't wear it.
3. By the same token, if you bend over and someone can see your thong, change your underwear, pants or just don't wear it.
4. If you went you walk past a mirror, you can see any part of your underwear, change the outfit or change the underwear.
5. If you find yourself constantly adjusting your outfit because it is too low cut, you don't have the right undergarments on OR it simply does not fit you, don't wear it.
6. If you can't sit or stand for ANY length of time in your outfit, don't wear it.
7. And lastly and simply, if you are uncomfortable in your outfit, don't wear it.

Be aware of the message you are sending to the world in the outfit that you wear. And hey I am ALL for confidence and being your own person, but you need to be prepared for the reaction you will receive, should you choose to dress inappropriately.

I used this quote this weekend...What we say and what we do define who we are...and how we dress adds into this. Perception is reality ladies and gentlemen, seriously! If you are perceived as a certain stereotype based on how you are dressed, even if you are not that way, you will be treated that way. SO I guess the best message ladies is to dress the way that you want to be perceived. Do you want to be a Jennifer Aniston or a Ke$ha? was an eye-opening experience. Perhaps I am getting too old and fuddy, duddy...I don't know. So, ladies and gentlemen, seriously, have a fabulous, classy week. Me, still looking for a job and looking for love, if you know of either that are available, certainly hit me up.


Sunday, October 2, 2011

Gentlemen Seriously...don't be a Chandler Bing

Or my favorite Mrs. Chanandaler Bong (for those that didn't watch Friends, that won't mean anything). Well this is a blog post for all of my gentlemen readers/fans. I hope you all remember the episode where Chandler goes out with Rachel's boss and he doesn't like her, but keeps ending the date with this statement "well, this is great, we should do it again. I'll call you". And then he has no intention of calling her...Well after my experience with the most recent doofus date, I thought I would share some thoughts based on that. Oh yes, we have a new inductee into the Dead to Me Hall of Fame, the Italian, who was briefly mentioned in a previous post. OK so here it goes...

For those of you that know me, you know that I am a fairly low maintenance, easy going date/girlfriend and honestly, I don't really want/need you to call me every day. But one thing annoys the CRAP out of me, gentelmen seriously, don't tell/text a girl that you will call her later, if you have no intention of calling. SERIOUSLY, so annoying. Just say talk to you soon. The Italian was REALLY good at telling me he could me later and never would. Don't be Chandler!

Additionally, gentlemen, ladies are planners. Don't be flaky about your plans, if you are going to make plans, keep them or be BLEEDING out of your eyes if you can't make it. The Italian would talk about getting together and then I would get a text message that he was going to bed...HUH? Seriously so annoying. I knew the man for a month and we went out twice, I think we had plans/tentative plans like 5-6 times.

And lastly, don't cancel via text message, so rude and annoying. Just shows me that you don't have the balls to call me to deliver the message. So gentlemn seriously, if you don't want to go out with a lady, or you don't want to call her, don't say that you will! Period. Don't be a Chandler Bing and don't be like the Italian.

And I guess you know precisely why the Italian is dead to me! Hope you all kept it classy this past weekend. Very bummed about the Husker loss yesterday...still can't win the big one. Thanks to my besties for hanging with me this weekend.